So now AF decides to arrive!! 14 days late and just in perfect time to fuck up my mock egg transfer in 2 days time, which will now be rearranged for two weeks time.
Where's my break?
Monday, 10 June 2013
waiting, waiting, waiting....
Still no sign of the witch. Where the hell is she?! Did another HPT on Thursday, which was a negative, obviously so we know there is no baby in there! Have one left in the cupboard which shall be done tonight - not because I think I'm pregnant, but because it's there.
Our mock ET on Wednesday may be able to go ahead after all, I'll just skip the 'period' part of this month.
If we were waiting to start IVF this cycle, I would actually be clawing at myself.
Our mock ET on Wednesday may be able to go ahead after all, I'll just skip the 'period' part of this month.
If we were waiting to start IVF this cycle, I would actually be clawing at myself.
Sunday, 9 June 2013
Boobs!
I took my bra off last night and made an audible "ouch!" sound and haven't been able to touch them or lay on them during the night. I am also pretty sure my bras are struggling to contain them! Beast breasts!
Still no sign of AF, but fingers crossed this means she'll be here soon.
Ouch!
Still no sign of AF, but fingers crossed this means she'll be here soon.
Ouch!
Friday, 7 June 2013
CD41
10 days late. Still no AF, still no sign of AF. Still normal, bog standard CM, not even a hint of blood and no sign of drying up (sorry!) which usually happens before AF.
10 fucking days body! Sort yourself out! I joked with my friend Cat this morning that having an unpredictable period is like having to plan for some sort of military operation every time you leave the house. In my handbag currently are three different types of tampon, some sanitary towels just in cases, paracetamol and codeine (if its really bad!) and dare I admit...even a spare pair of underwear for when she inevitably turns up unannounced, probably in the middle of an important meeting.
Non of the above has been needed yet, I'm having no cramping what so ever either and no positive pregnancy tests so there isn't anything growing in there.
Called the FS this morning to discuss my mock ET on Wednesday - They can't carry it out if I'm bleeding, BUT if she carries on like this she may not have arrived so I may not be bleeding....if that makes sense? They have made a note and have asked me to call back on Tuesday and let them know whats going on, I still have my nurse consultation on Wednesday anyway.
This conversation happened;
"How many days late are you?"
"Ten days"
"Is this normal?"
"Nope, not at all, usually very regular"
"Have you done a pregnancy test?"
"I've done four, all of which negative, she's just a pain in the arse!"
"Hmmmmm, wait and see over the weekend and then do another one. If your period doesn't arrive by Tuesday we might squeeze you in for a quick scan while you're here on Wednesday"
AF....you've had your fun now, pllleeeaaassseeee just show up!!!
p.s. Despite receiving more bad news in regards to my 'potential gall bladder surgery' I'm carrying on with this cycle as I normally would. Im just in that frame of mind, the chances of this NOT working are higher than the chances of it working and I feel great. I may be seen as irresponsible, but frankly, after 3 years I'm past caring.
10 fucking days body! Sort yourself out! I joked with my friend Cat this morning that having an unpredictable period is like having to plan for some sort of military operation every time you leave the house. In my handbag currently are three different types of tampon, some sanitary towels just in cases, paracetamol and codeine (if its really bad!) and dare I admit...even a spare pair of underwear for when she inevitably turns up unannounced, probably in the middle of an important meeting.
Non of the above has been needed yet, I'm having no cramping what so ever either and no positive pregnancy tests so there isn't anything growing in there.
Called the FS this morning to discuss my mock ET on Wednesday - They can't carry it out if I'm bleeding, BUT if she carries on like this she may not have arrived so I may not be bleeding....if that makes sense? They have made a note and have asked me to call back on Tuesday and let them know whats going on, I still have my nurse consultation on Wednesday anyway.
This conversation happened;
"How many days late are you?"
"Ten days"
"Is this normal?"
"Nope, not at all, usually very regular"
"Have you done a pregnancy test?"
"I've done four, all of which negative, she's just a pain in the arse!"
"Hmmmmm, wait and see over the weekend and then do another one. If your period doesn't arrive by Tuesday we might squeeze you in for a quick scan while you're here on Wednesday"
AF....you've had your fun now, pllleeeaaassseeee just show up!!!
p.s. Despite receiving more bad news in regards to my 'potential gall bladder surgery' I'm carrying on with this cycle as I normally would. Im just in that frame of mind, the chances of this NOT working are higher than the chances of it working and I feel great. I may be seen as irresponsible, but frankly, after 3 years I'm past caring.
Wednesday, 5 June 2013
damn you AF!
I am now on CD...erm....38 of my usually 31 day cycle and no AF. No sign of AF at all, obviously no positive pregnancy test either (don't be silly!) so who knows what's going on! I was SURE she was going to start yesterday morning as I had cramps, but nothing, now I don't even have cramps! What the hell!? This is highly unusual, I have had ONE cycle that lasted an extra 10 days around 7 months ago, but ever since then she's been like clockwork, obviously because I was her to come she wont. The bitch.
My mock ET is scheduled for in a weeks time, if she doesn't arrive today or tomorrow (possibly Friday at a push) I might have to reschedule it as I won't have stopped bleeding before the 12th. Great! Gah. Can anything else go wrong this month? Its definitely not stress, trust me I've been much more stressed in my life and AF has never altered, I always thought she was unshakable!!
Good news is on the gallbladder front I have spoken to a doctor friend and they said that depending on my ultrasound the specialist may try and push me for surgery because it's the 'easy option' but with having no attacks they don't see why surgery would be needed, and they can't MAKE me have surgery just to make it easier for them. As long as I know I have a slight increased risk of having gallstone attacked during pregnancy (but so do 20-30% of pregnancy woman) then that should be fine. So that's that decided. Part of me was even going to call the hospital yesterday and re-schedule my specialist appointment for after IVF to stop any un-needed worry or stress, but I feel better now.
Can everything send nasty vibes to the lining of my womb to make it want to come out, please?? While you're at it, everyone send HUGE positive thoughts to my friend Jess, whose having her egg transfer today. Thinking of you!!
xx
My mock ET is scheduled for in a weeks time, if she doesn't arrive today or tomorrow (possibly Friday at a push) I might have to reschedule it as I won't have stopped bleeding before the 12th. Great! Gah. Can anything else go wrong this month? Its definitely not stress, trust me I've been much more stressed in my life and AF has never altered, I always thought she was unshakable!!
Good news is on the gallbladder front I have spoken to a doctor friend and they said that depending on my ultrasound the specialist may try and push me for surgery because it's the 'easy option' but with having no attacks they don't see why surgery would be needed, and they can't MAKE me have surgery just to make it easier for them. As long as I know I have a slight increased risk of having gallstone attacked during pregnancy (but so do 20-30% of pregnancy woman) then that should be fine. So that's that decided. Part of me was even going to call the hospital yesterday and re-schedule my specialist appointment for after IVF to stop any un-needed worry or stress, but I feel better now.
Can everything send nasty vibes to the lining of my womb to make it want to come out, please?? While you're at it, everyone send HUGE positive thoughts to my friend Jess, whose having her egg transfer today. Thinking of you!!
xx
Monday, 3 June 2013
Feeling better
Apologies for my very depressive and dramatic post yesterday, I just had "one of those days" I suppose. I feel much better today.
I've done more research as to my gallstones and if you have gallstones without any symptoms or frequent attacks, they are classed as asymptomatic gallstones and only 10- 20% of people with asymptomatic gallstones will ever need surgery, and up to 25% of the population have them and are only found by accident.. Most are prescribed painkillers incase of an attack and told to just keep an eye on it. The longer you go without an 'attack' the less likely you are to have one. Usual gallstone attacks occur a few times a week, or weekly, I've gone 3.5 months without any pain so I think I'm OK :)
Met with FS today, we signed off the forms to go through the "antagonist protocol" or IVF, which is different to long and short protocol in that its designed for woman who are at risk from OHSS. They use less of the stimming medication but just as much LH, so fewer eggs but hopefully of good quality. They aim to get between 5-10 eggs per cycle. They prefer to for 5 day transfers all being well, and take it from there.
Success rates are around 30%, although FS believes ours should be slightly higher given our ages and my AMH, but we will get a better idea once they've done egg collection.
We even asked FS about the holiday we have booked in October and she said we would only be 14 weeks pregnant so would be absolutely fine to go on holiday. If it works obviously.
I've done more research as to my gallstones and if you have gallstones without any symptoms or frequent attacks, they are classed as asymptomatic gallstones and only 10- 20% of people with asymptomatic gallstones will ever need surgery, and up to 25% of the population have them and are only found by accident.. Most are prescribed painkillers incase of an attack and told to just keep an eye on it. The longer you go without an 'attack' the less likely you are to have one. Usual gallstone attacks occur a few times a week, or weekly, I've gone 3.5 months without any pain so I think I'm OK :)
Met with FS today, we signed off the forms to go through the "antagonist protocol" or IVF, which is different to long and short protocol in that its designed for woman who are at risk from OHSS. They use less of the stimming medication but just as much LH, so fewer eggs but hopefully of good quality. They aim to get between 5-10 eggs per cycle. They prefer to for 5 day transfers all being well, and take it from there.
Success rates are around 30%, although FS believes ours should be slightly higher given our ages and my AMH, but we will get a better idea once they've done egg collection.
We even asked FS about the holiday we have booked in October and she said we would only be 14 weeks pregnant so would be absolutely fine to go on holiday. If it works obviously.
Sunday, 2 June 2013
Can't get my head straight :(
I've got my appointment through with the gastro specialist on June 17th, five days after mock egg transfer. I'm determined to NOT have any surgery, Im not having any symptoms, I'm living pain free, after the antibiotics I've been eating a livin just fine, and the bottom line is I don't WANT to have surgery at 25 without looking at other options. I might get a slight 'niggle' in my back/abdomen a few times a month but NOTHING compared to when I had ulcers.
I've asked dr google and if you have gallbladder surgery IVF and any TTC activities can be put on hold for up to 6 months. After all this waiting, do we want to take time out for something that isn't causing me any problems? Alternatively I can completely understand why doctors would be looking at me in a negative light for thinking this way, but after I suffered from ulcers and gastritis for 18months solid, I now feel AMAZING!
On the other hand the IVF could fail and we sould have put everythig webe wanted for ao long on hold for huhe disappointment, but if it does fail then we can think about doing the surgery after July, I really think we would welcome a break after going through something so emotionally and psychologically draining and destroying as a failed IVF.
I don't know what I'm thinking or feeling. I'm terrified something is going to happen to fuck up our first true shot at having IVF. I know I keep saying this but I feel great!
So stressed and worried to the point of just wanting to burst into tears thinking about it, doesn't help that after wishing AF would hold out, she's now 5 days late and no signs she's goings to show up any time soon.
I've asked dr google and if you have gallbladder surgery IVF and any TTC activities can be put on hold for up to 6 months. After all this waiting, do we want to take time out for something that isn't causing me any problems? Alternatively I can completely understand why doctors would be looking at me in a negative light for thinking this way, but after I suffered from ulcers and gastritis for 18months solid, I now feel AMAZING!
On the other hand the IVF could fail and we sould have put everythig webe wanted for ao long on hold for huhe disappointment, but if it does fail then we can think about doing the surgery after July, I really think we would welcome a break after going through something so emotionally and psychologically draining and destroying as a failed IVF.
I don't know what I'm thinking or feeling. I'm terrified something is going to happen to fuck up our first true shot at having IVF. I know I keep saying this but I feel great!
So stressed and worried to the point of just wanting to burst into tears thinking about it, doesn't help that after wishing AF would hold out, she's now 5 days late and no signs she's goings to show up any time soon.
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