Remember me?

Its been a very long time since I updated, at least in Steph terms anyway. Partly because I have had nothing to say.

Things have been...erm...bad. I'm not feeling to great with everything at the moment so I've not been in much of a mood for chitter chatter on here.

I'm still in limbo, no surgery date for my cholecystectomy, no communication of how long I have left to wait. I can't, realistically, see the fertility specialist until after surgery (as there is nothing to discuss before..) so we still don't know if we have funding, lost funding etc... work is, frankly, shit. I leave this place most days just thankful I've gotten through without throwing sharp objects at people. I think describing my current state of existence as floating between two islands is fairly apt.

My mood and depression has meant I can't stand to be around or converse with many people who aren't Martin. He gets it, he's the only one who gets it, so it makes sense to stay grounded to him, right?

On the other hand we will be jetting off for 7 days here...

...in exactly 20 days. To say I'm mildly excited would be an understatement. At the minute my excitement for Tunisia is sort of managing to sugar coat everything else. I'm slightly worried about the immediate holiday blues that are sure to follow. I'm already dreading coming home and we haven't even gone yet! 

Our 2nd wedding anniversary is on October 26th and we've booked to go to Dublin for the weekend, so thats another thing to look forward to. :)

After than we have to just wait until 2014, and hope that we can get back on track with TTC. I had a month of using OPKs but I just can't do it. I knew I was ovulating this week and I intentionally avoided sex for the 5 days leading up to, and the 5 days following, realistically after 3.5years getting pregnant naturally is a one in a million, I'm not going to put myself through the trauma of AF arriving for one in a million, I had 2.5 years of that shit!!

I'm hoping that my next update comes sooner and is titled something like "SURGERY DATE!!!". Fingers crossed!