6dp5dt

Still feeling overwhelmingly negative. Anybody who has ever said "oh...I'll just enjoy being PUPO until beta day" is a HUGE FAT LIAR. Don't get me wrong, I understand how extremely lucky we are to even be going through FET (ha. Can anyone ever be lucky to go through FET?!) but nobody can enjoy THIS!?

Feeling tired and exhausted. I'm not attributing that to anything biological as we spent 3-4 hours solid walking around the city yesterday, and passed out after dinner (and my one illegal TWW beer!) at 7.30pm. Slept right through til 7.30am! Had nothing 4-5 mile walk today to visit schindlers factory and the old Jewish ghetto on Krakow, came back to the hotel at 3pm after 5 hours on foot and slept for another 90mins. Not like me at all, but neither is walking for this amount of time.

I keep getting lower back/hip-ache after walking for a while. I don't remember ever having it before, but again, I don't tend to walk 10km a day.

Boobs are a little tender, but I am 11dpo so it could be AF gearing up to arrive. No noticeable cramps. We walked past a pharmacy earlier and Martin asked if I wanted to buy a test (as it's my birthday and I wanted to celebrate with a glass of red if I was able to) but I said no. Part of me knows it's too earlier, part of me, despite expecting a BFN tomorrow, still doesn't need to see it just yet.

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me....happy birthday to me.

P.s Ladies, how many attempts to you give a friend before officially dumping them? My best friend who I met at University and lived with, the one having the affair that I was expected to keep from Martin, is seriously causing me nothing but anger. She texts when she feels like it, or wants to tell me she has a new car/dress/shoes/something expensive or that she's getting a raise etc.... Will ask about baby-related treatment very occasionally, but never actually seems to care how it's going. Just a general "oh good news!" Or "I'll keep me fingers crossed" and that's it. E.g. Many people text me the night before transfer just saying "good luck for tomorrow". She texts me that afternoon saying "are you at the hospital today?" And I haven't heard anything since. She is the sort of person who blames her phone when she doesn't text back, claiming her signal was bad, she did but she doesn't understand why it didn't send etc... Despite the fact she has an iPhone and doesn't live in the 18th century. Today, it 4pm and she has yet to wish me a happy birthday.

Martin is best friends with her boyfriend (the one she was cheating on) and I don't want to cause trouble between them but....really?! I don't have many close friends, I don't feel the need to. I have my best friend from school who I know is there whenever I need her, and I did have this person, but having written all of this down on paper (blog...) I can see how referring to her as a best friend is seeming increasingly stupid.

I wonder if she'll remember to ask what our result was later this week? This is after everything I did for her back at Christmas when she was busy cheating. What would you do, my wise ladies?