7dp5dt

Well, this is it. It's 5am in Poland (thank god for free wi-if), Martin is snoring next to me and our flight home is in 5 hours.

I'm wide awake and googling "7dp5dt no symptoms" to see what dr google had to say about things and I can't sleep. I know this is going to be bfn, I just have the gut feeling this isn't it for us. But I can't stop thinking MAYBE I'll be like one of these woman on the internet that after talking about no symptoms for days on end, suddenly pops up on the message board with "MY BETA WAS 3567854!". But I'm not one of those woman, I've never had those sorts of endings.

4am UK time and all I can picture is that FRER that's waiting on the bathroom cupboard for me when I get home in 10 hours and I feel sick. (To the point where at 4am I've already been to the bathroom twice with an upset tummy...totally not symptom related, I have an emotional bowel!) I'm trying to pre-emt myself and practise seeing a negative, and remember that I have numerous things to do to get ready for going back to work tomorrow. I've already scheduled in 3-6pm for crying and general moping, and then I can iron and shower, drink wine, watch game of thrones and go to bed. But, that stupid little
Niggly voice in the back of my head is whispering "...imagine if the second line came up! You can be one of those woman!"

SHUT UP NIGGLY VOICE, you are not doing us any favours!

P.s Can I just take a moment to vent frustration at woman who say "I had absolutely no symptoms what so ever! I mean, I did have some tugging in my uterus area, my boobs increased two cup sizes, my nipples took over my chest, I gagged at the sight of cheese, peed every 20 minutes and slept for days on end...but apart from that nothing! Good luck with beta!" SERIOUSLY WOMEN?!