Photo 10 -Your dinner plate
Technically not my dinner plate, but this is what I made for dinner last night. Chicken and bacon spicy creole jambalaya. It was delicious. I didn't have a plate to take a photo of as I only ate a few mouthfuls before my stomach pain stopped me from eating. It smelt nice though!
Photo 11 - Gratitude
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This is a selection of all the things in my life I am grateful for.
Top - My home. I took this photograph myself whilst in the passenger seat of our car. I love the views we get driving around our villages. I have lived and visited many places in my life, but Yorkshire will always be my favorite place.
Middle left - Music. Pretty much self explanatory, I've already had my rant about music so I don't need to say anymore!
Middle right - Family. They might drive me mad on a regular basis, but I wouldn't swap them (well maybe a few of them) for the world.
Bottom left - Friends. I would ALMOST go as far as to say my friends are more important to me than family. I know, what a dreadful thing to say, but my family have a colour history. My friends are there every day and through every event. So maybe my friends are my family?
Bottom Right - Coffee. I love it so much, which makes it even harder than I can't drink it!! My stomach has now gotten so bad my morning coffee makes me cry with pain, therefore my life is now water, water and more water.
Life
Is OK. Not great, not bad, but OK. My stomach issues are now ruining my existence more than I ever thought possible. Usually I have pain in the evenings, throw up, go to bed on an empty stomach and wake up fine the next day. For some reason I have now been in pain since Friday afternoon (It's Tuesday morning) and haven't been able to keep anything more than a banana down. Not because food makes me nauseous, but because the only way I can manage the pain is to throw up everything that's in my stomach. The pills aren't working, I've tried taking one at different times, I've tried taking 2, I've even tried taking 3! I've drank bottles and bottles of gaviscon, loaded myself up with pain killers and nothing. The hospital won't do anything for me because I'm not throwing up blood, the GP won't do anything for me because I've been referred to a specialist. The waiting list for the specialist is 18 weeks. I haven't eaten a full meal now for 10 weeks. December 17th was the last meal I ate without pain. It could possibly be another 10 weeks before I get to see the specialist...ARGH!!
Apart from that I suppose I'm OK. I'm panicking about how on earth I'm going to be able to go through IUI with these stomach problems, theres no way I can carry on throwing up everything I eat after the treatment, the strain it puts on my stomach and abdomen is just silly. So if it isn't fixed before treatment I can't throw up, which means coping with the agony the best I can.
I don't know what to do.
Dear god, steph. I wonder if its some out of control stomach ulcer. They can't bump you up in sooner? You haven't been able to eat a real meal in forever!!! I'm sure your throat is burning from throwing up as well. I hope they don't make you wait that long because not enough nutrients are being put in your body. You would think your case would have some sort of urgency and priority in their eyes. Stupid ass NHS. I'm sorry, I hope you can get through this.
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