Why is everything just shit?

I'm down in the dumps, as you can imagine. I feel like crap. The Augmentin is making me feel worse and worse with every dose, not to mention I need a dose of codeine just to eat a meal now. Plus I should have been having egg collection right around today...so I'm a big ball of negativity.

The clinic asked me to take 4 extra days of Cetrotide, I assume that's to give my ovaries time to calm down before any ovulation occurs. Also, ovulation with that amount of eggs?! How the hell will the work? Anyway...I went to the clinic to collect the Cetrotide and one of the nurses who has been dealing with us saw me, stopped performing her morning scans and took me into a room so we could have a chat. Did I mention we love our clinic? Denise (the nurse) is so lovely, so asked how I was doing and if I understood why they had to stop the IVF, which of course I did. She has already made an appointment for us to speak with the doctor on September 9th, before us even having to ask. She also had to have her gallbladder removed not long ago, so she said she understood what was going on. She said that although recovery from surgery is quick, they'd like me to have a little extra time as when I'm going through IVF I wouldn't be able to take any pain meds or antibiotics of anything which may come as a result of the surgery, which makes perfect sense. We have out holiday in October, so realistically, it will be November before we can pick this back up again. Yes, not a typo, November. 4 months from now. 4 fucking months. As if we haven't waited and waited and waited. I want to cry every time I think of it.

I called my surgeon as soon as I left the clinic, as I had been given an open appointment to have the cholesestectomy when I so wished, and got through to his secretary. She explained that she thought I was wrong and I actually only had an appointment to SEE the consultant again, and I'd still have to go on the waiting list for the surgery, but she will speak to the surgeon. I'm not getting too angry just yet, because I know she SHOULD be in the wrong, however if it pans out this way, which is completely different to the information I've been told, it will be 18 weeks before possible surgery. That means no IVF until 2014. Did I mention I was hospitalised with this mere days ago and they already knew about the issue, but will still make me wait almost 4 months?! Thats 4 months of it possibly happening again at any time...I'm hoping I can kick and scream loud enough for then to listen, but I'm seriously loosing faith that we will every be parents.

Yes, totally and utterly down in dumps at the minute. I'm sick of dealing with this shit. When have we last had a good month? Why can't ANYTHING go our way? We need some luck.